Mutineer will be participating in the first-ever Hollywood Fringe Festival this June with an original piece called Shaked and Speared–The Afterplays.

Check back for more details…

photo by Chris Hall

Today we bring you the last in a four-part series of posts that will help you get to know the beautiful and talented cast members of DITCH.

Alex Klein is also making is onstage debut with MTC, although he’s a charter member who was also an active part of the process that brought MTC’s first production, LIE WITH ME, to the stage. Currently he can be seen as William in DITCH.

Without giving too much away, what is your favorite aspect of the character you are portraying in DITCH?

Throughout this whole process, I’ve really enjoyed exploring Will’s practically bi-polar relationships with Bill and Beth and how much he is defined by his interactions with each.  Parts of Will are subverted or accentuated based on his comfort level with them. All of this informs and helps create a full, fun character to play that makes my weekend nights a blast.

If you could play any role written for the opposite sex, what role would that be?

Ever?  Well, considering it’s a well known scientific fact that girls are still the carrier of the “coodies” virus, let’s split the difference and say Dustin Hoffman’s character from TOOTSIE...HA! Just kidding… In DITCH, Elizabeth would be a great challenge and tons o’ fun. In any other play, I’d say MEDEA from MEDEA or Sister Aloysius from DOUBT would be pretty satisfying to dive into too.

What’s your favorite thing to do when you’re not working/rehearsing?

I’m a tremendous nerd and ravenous for comic books.  Can’t get enough of them.  My church is a comic book store and mass is held on Wednesdays when new books come out.  I also sculpt and have done work for film and the comic collectibles industry. I love watching, playing and analyzing basketball, football and baseball when I get the time.

What was the first play you remember seeing?

LAST OF THE READ HOT LOVERS.  My dad played the main guy, but I was 6 years old, didn’t know what the hell was going on and was bored out of my little mind.  Sorry dad…

Do you have any upcoming projects you’d like to share?

Go to YouTube and type in, “Dauntless Legends”.  It’s a short film that I was part of this summer.  Not the most tremendous acting or scintillating dialogue, but the story is fun, the fight scenes are pretty cool and the editing/directing is really sharp.  It’s sure to brighten 14-and-a-half minutes of your day.

What is your dream project?

Hamlet in HAMLET

DITCH runs through February 28^th. Come on out and see how much fun Alex and the rest of the cast are having!

Photo By Chris Hall

Today we bring you the third in a four-part series of posts that will help you get to know the beautiful and talented cast members of DITCH.

Todd Veneman is making his MTC stage debut, although he had a role in the audio play THE MILLER’S GHOST last fall, and he’s also developing an original play with MTC. Currently he is entertaining audiences as the hilarious and cynical Bill in DITCH.

Without giving too much away, what is your favorite aspect of the character you are portraying in DITCH?

I think Bill makes a special connection with everyone who likes to rush home and watch TV.

If you could play any role written for the opposite sex, what role would that be?

This is a tough one, but I think I’d like to play Laura in THE GLASS MENAGERIE by Tennessee Williams. In most of the performances I’ve seen, the actresses never really found the funny.

What’s your favorite thing to do when you’re not working/rehearsing?

I like to rush home and watch TV.

What was the first play you remember seeing?

The first play I remember seeing was BILLY BART, SCOURGE OF THE WEST. I was also in the play. In fact, that’s how I see most plays; by being cast in them.

Do you have any upcoming projects you’d like to share?

When not rushing home to watch TV, I’m writing furiously on what I hope to be Mutineer Theater’s next show.

What is your dream project?

Any show that includes my current cast mates. To Alex, thank you for your wit and camaraderie. To Nina, thank you for your strength and confidence. To Amber, thank you for not freaking out when I spilled a bottle of water on your pristine, color coded script, and also, thanks for just being you. All of you have made this a memory I won’t forget for at least a couple of years.

DITCH runs through February 28^th. Come on out and see how much fun Todd and the rest of the cast are having!

Photo by Chris Hall

Today we bring you the second in a four-part series of posts that will help you get to know the beautiful and talented cast members of DITCH.

Nina Millin is making her MTC stage debut as the boisterous Elizabeth, a role which she read at the very first MTC reading of DITCH way back in 2007.

 Without giving too much away, what is your favorite aspect of the character you are portraying in DITCH?

There’s actually quite a bit I respect about Elizabeth. At this very moment, I think I have to say her unapologetic nature. If you asked me this tomorrow or even 5 minutes from now the answer could be completely different!

 If you could play any role written for the opposite sex, what role would that be?

Willy Wonka.

What’s your favorite thing to do when you’re not working/rehearsing?

Crochet!

 What was the first play you remember seeing?

CINDERELLA. I was probably 6 years old. The prince came into the audience with the glass slipper looking for the perfect fit. I remember being convinced (even though I knew how the story was going to turn out) that it was MY foot that was going to fit into the slipper.

 Do you have any upcoming projects you’d like to share? 

Yes! Keep an eye out for updates on www.ninamillin.com

 What is your dream project?

Not sure of the specifics but it includes crocheting, The Public Theatre in NYC, Meryl Streep and Quantum Physics.

 DITCH runs through February 28^th. Come on out and meet Nina and the rest of the cast in person!

Amber Hamilton boasts the distinction of being the only performer to have appeared in both of MTC’s world premiere stage productions, having appeared as Susan in LIE WITH ME last year. Currently she’s bringing to life the character of Beth. Here’s what she has to say about the experience…

Without giving too much away, what is your favorite aspect of the character you are portraying in DITCH?

I respect that Beth was brave enough to walk away from the altar to follow her heart and find true love. I love how quick she is to forgive and constantly seeks to find the good in everyone. She’s optimistic and fights for what she feels in her heart even when the odds are against her.

If you could play any role written for the opposite sex, what role would that be?

I’d be Bill [from DITCH]…or really I just want to be Todd so I can be funny.

What’s your favorite thing to do when you’re not working/rehearsing?

I finally get to read something besides my script! My favorite thing to do is curl up with a good movie and a big bowl of popcorn. Catching up on sleep has also been nice.

What was the first play you remember seeing?

CATS!

Do you have any upcoming projects you’d like to share?

Filming a short film titled “Tom Fool and the Ballad of the Lost Sparrow” about a happless clown, incapable of emotion, who learns to connect with the outside world through a brief yet dynamic encounter with a lost sparrow (me).

What is your dream project?

Me in a love triangle with Ryan Gosling and Christian Bale. Just kidding. Ok…I’m not kidding, but seriously my dream is to just be able to keep doing what I love, which is acting and performing. I feel extremely lucky to have this opportunity, and I hope there are many more to come!

DITCH runs through February 28th. Come on out and see how much fun Amber and the rest of the cast are having!

Loreli Deleon

I figured I’d write a little blog update because frankly every other MTC’er is TOO busy! As I type the whole team is in the Lounge Theatre in Hollywood conquering the great “10 out of 12” cue to cue and then a full run. For those non-theatre insiders, “10 out of 12” is the only day the union allows for a 12 hour work day with a 2 hour break to use for meals. A “cue to cue” is basically the first time lights, costumes and sound are added- so you trudge steadily through the script perfecting each moment. It can be tedious. It’s a lot of hurry up and wait. It’s usually the day the actors only get to say a few lines because the focus is mostly technical. It’s actually a lot like working on a film come to think of it.

With almost 300 tech cues- Ditch is a monster for a “small theatre” production. Today will be an essential, but very long day.

It’s my lunch break at the office, even though I am at my desk tired after a long weekend and drinking an AWAKE Starbucks tea the size of my bladder (as if this will “wake” me up/although it reminds me of the Big Gulps I used to drink during my Psych Lectures in college. The act of drinking kept me more awake than the actual caffeine)… I am feeling a bit lonely.  Although, historically cue to cue makes me want to gouge my eyes out- it bums me out not to be in the darkened theatre for 12 hours.

This week is tech week and a magical part of the process. Starting last Friday night, it means late nights, a lot of stress, a heightened need to problem solve, and lots of excitement. After last night’s rehearsal (which ended at 11pm), I was amazed at the tech team’s energy descending upon the theatre. Suddenly a room that should have been exhausted and ready to go home for a good night’s sleep was a buzz with electricity. Literally and figuratively. The energy with which the team shifted from rehearsal mode to technical mode was strangely infectious.

It’s really been an honor to watch people put their hearts, time, and passion into something that began on my hard-drive. The very first reading was on my friend Christine’s couch in DC a few blocks from the Capital with some college friends (shout out to Mark who read William first and recently suggested how dare I develop a play without him- to which I reply move to LA and come play!). Today, years later it’s like a strange and beautiful version of Frankenstein for me. My role as playwright isn’t as necessary at this point and I am just trying to stay out of everyone’s way. Don’t get me wrong, I still have input, ideas, and a willingness to help. But the tasks of the playwright this week are pretty small comparatively. It allows me to really find the moments to sit back and go “Wow.”

This play now truly belongs to the MTC team and it is incredibly humbling to watch. The process of writing a play is very quiet, cerebral, and isolated. The process of development is very grueling, exposing and enlightening. The process of production is much how I imagine birth to be- messy, wraught with stress and uncertainty, but in the end, it’s full of awe and wonder.

Creating a play is one of those rare art forms that demands collaboration and depends on the strength of community. As we gear up for Saturday’s opening, the final part is required. It’s the very final ingredient in the process. It’s the part I have zero control over.  I hope people come. The audience is essential to this whole thing. It’s the last piece of the puzzle.

And of course, I hope people enjoy it.  After all, I made this for you.

We made this for you.

Liz Brown as Susan and Ryan Mulkay as Ian

He was a character I won’t soon forget. Probably because he was so cool. Or was he simple? Slow? Smart? Good vocabulary, but not very street smart. Edgy? Well, if you consider his line of work. In love? Yes, he is definitely in love. In over his head? Yes, he is definitely in over his head. This is Ian. This is how I approached such a character. A seven-layer dip of creation if you will. So much to work with. Ian is someone who is constantly being thrown curve balls and is fighting to keep up—but who isn’t? That’s just life. Although, his curve balls seem to be a bit faster.

I began by grounding Ian in the idea that he should be the audience’s perspective. He is one of them, facing these issues for them. If I had my way, it would appear that this guy came to the theater, bought a ticket and found a seat; I would say a front row seat. Then, at just the right moment (about 15 min. into the play) he decides to step on stage and get to know this family. Of course they know and welcome him (sort of), he knows his lines and his blocking and the play goes on. Now, of course I don’t mean I wanted this to be a gimmicky performance art piece, just that it seemed like this guy was in way over his head and trying to keep up with the rest of the people in this story. And he was cool—he had to be cool. That was only the beginning.

After some very helpful discussion with two therapists who deal with the issues present in the play, I began to see him as more. He is someone with a NEED to help, no matter how difficult that becomes. Someone who loves a girl and wants so badly to be the one to protect her but is just not equipped. Someone who wants to be in the thick of it without thinking of the consequences. Someone who just wants to help. That was the great fun and challenge of the role, from scene to scene—trying to be the savior to a group who doesn’t want my saving.

As the show grew, the role grew. While the weeks of rehearsal and performances went by, I was still constantly finding new things to filter the fastballs that are constantly thrown Ian’s way. It seems only fitting that as we were getting ready to close the show, I felt I was just getting started. I wanted to keep going. I wanted to see what else there was to find on the stage every night. That in large part was due to the cast of people around me. Every night was something fresh, exciting and new. Never a stale performance and never a dull scene. I guess we’ll have to wait for the tour to pick up where we left off.

It’s been an exciting and rewarding (as cliché as that sounds) process to travel to Washington, DC and work on this play. I was proud to be a member of our company. I was proud to represent us in front of a new cast, crew and audience. It’s opportunities like these when I am reminded why it is we do what we do. I wanted to tell a good story, do good work and challenge myself as well as the audience, in that, I knew I was not just doing these things for myself but that I was a part of something bigger. I was a part of what Mutineer stands for—new, thought provoking work worth doing.

The second production of Lie With Me has come to a close and it’s tough not to miss it already.

(Illustration by Loreli Deleon)

Tomorrow will be the very first DITCH rehearsal I won’t attend… The show previews on the 29^th and opens on 30^th and my role as the playwright is becoming less and less needed in the production process.

Don’t get me wrong, I may still be around to change a phrase here and a word there. However, the play is the play at this point. The last round of major changes was submitted over the holidays and as we began 2010 the play, on the most part, is complete.

I’ve enjoyed quietly listening from rehearsal this past week. Jon and the cast are really hitting their strides. There have been moments where I have genuinely felt heart-warmed by their work. Almost, in some moments moved to tears by seeing the life of these roles become flesh and blood. These actors have guts and heart and under Jon’s direction- I am so confident in production.  All four truly shine. It’s genuinely fun to see… and strange.

I imagine this being the closest I have in this lifetime come to raising a child and watching it become an adult you can no longer control.

I truly believe art, on some level, is rarely ever done. It’s the artist who is done… ready for new adventures.

Illustration By Loreli Deleon

I’ve known Loreli Deleon since middle school back in Fairfax, Virginia. I am honored to say that through the years she has been the best of friends and developed into one of the most talented artists I know.

Just out of college, I wrote and performed a one woman piece called STREAM that was read at the Kennedy Center’s Page to Stage Festival with Smallbeer Theatre Company. This piece was a modern take on the Ophelia story… As a gift and show of support, Loreli designed a poster for the piece and I’ve traveled with it throughout the years.

When Ditch was coming into fruition, I contacted Loreli. Inspired by her work, I felt like the world of this play could really be translated and complimented by her artistry and talent. She read the play and we’ve worked tirelessly to collaborate on an illustration. She did a first draft of sort for our reading a few months back. Much like the play itself, since the read we’ve worked (well really LORELI has worked) to deepen the art. That translates to mostly getting emailed designs and me replying with “COOL”…or “AWESOME” to whatever developments Loreli had made.

Oh did I mention, Loreli lives in Germany?

Yep! Germany. So in the beauty of modern technology, two friends and artists can collaborate across oceans to create art… It’s really pretty cool. Honestly sometimes I forget that we haven’t talked personally in a long time because our dialogue since beginning this project has been so constant. In fact it wasn’t till the other day did I go, “WOW, I don’t even have your phone number??” Although I am not sure I could afford the call! Mostly she is consoling me over my new found addiction to Harry and David’s Moose Munch- which has been quite the companion while I’ve sat long hours with Final Draft open. We’ve also gotten decent at figuring out the hours and time difference between these time zones…

So here is the design. I think it’s pretty righteous and really illustrates the emotional heart of this piece. I am so grateful to Loreli for her artistry and her efforts. She really has created an invitation of sorts into the world of this play and set the tone.

I think the last time I saw Loreli was a few years back when she was living in Hawaii. It is across a different ocean this time (well, depending which way you go)… and I hope to see her soon and am so grateful that the world can be so connected and bring people together for art, support, and at the end of the day or the beginning depending on the time zone, love.

Thanks Loreli!

I’ve always wanted to write a love story. But i’ve always wanted to write honestly about love… the experience of it. So I wrote DITCH.

I believe to write honestly about love you have to explore self as much as the romance. I think our relationship with ourselves dictates our ability to successfully love others… our ability or inability to communicate. The dysfunction that troubled communication causes… especially when love exists.  We certainly haven’t gotten much smarter in our skills of love judging from Jane Austen’s observations of nearly 200 years ago. We just get in our own way… time and time again. That’s what I wanted to write about…and I think it speaks to us all on some level.

A friend of mine posted this video on their facebook. I found it particularly appropriate…

On Monday afternoon I finished mixing Kristi Falls Behind, the final chapter of The Miller’s Ghost. Now it’s online, completing the story. I’ve been so consumed by this project over the past three months that I’m having a little trouble adjusting to life without having the piece to work on. It’s the sort of feeling I used to have at the end of each semester in college.

I’ve been trying to wrap my head around the scale of this project. It began in the spring, when my friend John (Housemate #3) mailed me a CD of the recording his wife had made of Mr. Spreeman telling the story. Over the following eight months, there was an escalating quantity of work that went into it. There were 62 pages of script, including 22 speaking parts, 20 music cues and about 250 sound cues. We spent about 40 hours in the recording studio, and who knows how much time editing and mixing (I spent at least 35 hours on Kristi Falls Behind in the last week alone). Nor could I tell you exactly how much time the design team spent on the web site. It all culminated in five chapters that tell one 66-minute story.

I am grateful to MTC for green-lighting this project, and to Mr. Spreeman for giving it his blessing. Nearly every company member contributed something to the development, production and distribution of the piece. Without them, this would have been a very different piece, if I had finished it at all. That collaboration and cooperation in the service of new dramatic work is what we are about at MTC. LA people, if you liked TMG, come see our next show, Ditch, this coming February. For those of you who don’t live in LA, check back with us periodically – TMG is only the first of what we hope will be a diverse catalog of online works.

Fundamentally, TMG is about people sharing scary stories. With Halloween coming up, there’s no better time to do it. We’ve shared ours with you – now we’d love to hear yours. Were you ever in a situation where something happened that you couldn’t explain, that freaked you out? Did you ever make up a story to scare your friends around the campfire? Click on the Share Scary Stories link and send the chills our way. Who knows – your tale may become the inspiration for our next production.

Ryan Mulkay rehearses the role of Ian

I was first introduced to Lie with Me at its Los Angeles staged reading following its workshop with Mutineer Theatre Company. At the time I was not yet a member of the company and simply came to the show to be entertained and show support to friends. I enjoyed the play, though a bit different from the current script, and ironically was immediately drawn to the role of Ian. Later, I saw the show when the Mutineers did a full production of the play, though by this time, I was a member of the company. Again, I was a fan, so it only seems natural that I would eventually become involved in a production of the show – right? I think so.

Returning to DC to work on Lie with Me at Charter, and play with the role of Ian, has been a wonderful experience. Since the last run of the show, there have been some rewrites to the script, minor changes here and there and a bit of a tweak to my character. So although I was familiar with the show, this was going to be different – and it indeed is. I can not rely on the things that I previously thought or knew about Ian. He has changed and in my opinion (and with no disrespect to the character or the fantastic actor who has previously played him -it was brilliant) Ian is now a richer, more developed character. It has been a lot of work and a lot of fun finding the new Ian - hopefully I am on the right track.

Working with the cast has been an adventure. Every rehearsal feels like a session in the gym. Such talented actors, giving and taking (or what the cast refers to as “giving someone Ping so that they can Pong”) working hard and finding new things everyday. Again, I was familiar with this play before but have never seen these characters like this – a tribute to any good actor in my opinion.

We will be moving onto the set this week, getting closer to our first audience, and getting ready to open a Lie with Me that I am confident no one has seen before.

As it turned out, Steve and the Attic, the third chapter of The Miller’s Ghost, was much more difficult to produce than either chapter 1 or 2. It wasn’t any longer, and probably used fewer individual sound effects, and certainly had a lot less music. It only had four characters in it, and I’d already made the mix decisions for three of them back in chapter 1, since Laurie, Steve and Spieler were still in the living room. Where the first two chapters almost always had some kind of sound bed going on (crowds, rain, river, etc.), chapter 3 was often rather still.

And that was the problem. A sound mixer can get away with a lot of less than ideal things when there are a ton of elements on top of one another. But when you’re only asked to listen to one or two sounds at a time, and then given a beat before the next sound, all the details are exposed.

I wanted to put the listener in the house with Steve, hearing what he heard. And what he heard scared the crap out of him. So I needed to make sure that the sounds were distinct enough for the listener to interpret them the same way Steve did. But, just as importantly, the listener has to find them horrifying, too.

That was where I got bogged down. The Thump was working for me – it’s the same sound I used when Karl and Erik went to the mill at the end of Karl’s Tale. And the attic door and stairs came together pretty well. But the stuff happening on the other side of Steve’s door was a nightmare (and not the kind I intended). Originally, I tried to use a handful of canned sound effects played through a filter for the banging on the doors. But they weren’t measuring up to the sounds I’d always imagined for that scene – they weren’t scary enough.

So, the weekend before we published chapter 3, I threw them all out and started over. I decided to produce the sounds more naturally: I set the microphone up beside my studio door, went out in the hall, and banged on all the doors in the house. Simple – I should have done that in the first place. Then I had to mix them so that they sounded menacing while leaving enough room for Steve’s narration to be heard.

I still wasn’t sure I’d found the right balance. But when I played the scene for my wife and a few MTC members, they assured me that it was working, and that I didn’t really need to change anything. Where would this project be without the contributions of those good people?

On to chapter 4, which is also proving difficult, but for very different reasons.

Not really – I wasn’t born until the seventies. But my dad was. He began playing guitar in the late fifties, and by his senior year of high school in 1964, his band was playing at parties nearly every weekend.

Coincidentally, one of the first scenes of The Miller’s Ghost takes place at a house party in 1964. I didn’t want to have to worry about the expense and legal hassle of licensing a hit song from that year to help set that scene. So who better to play at Spieler’s house than my dad’s band?

My folks were in LA in late September to visit my daughter (and me, I guess). While they were entertaining her (or was it the other way around), I was working for uninterrupted hours on TMG. But on one day of that weekend, I had my mom take the baby to the hotel pool so Dad and I could record his music.

I set up the microphone in the bedroom across the hall from my studio. He wasn’t familiar with playing to a click track, and I don’t think my headphone cable was long enough to reach out there anyway. So he recorded the guitar and lead vocals for “Little Girl, Go Away” in one take. He came back into the studio to help coach me through the other parts: bass, keyboard and drums, all of which I programmed into my sampler. It was difficult to lock in the rhythm section since the tempo wasn’t perfectly consistent (and I’m not much of a drummer). But I think it came out alright, especially since I didn’t want to spend more than a couple of hours on it. In the story, it’s supposed to be a live band. Maybe they just need to practice more.

Little Girl, Go Away
Little Girl, Go Away

My dad also played the acoustic guitar music we hear when Spieler and Laurie first enter the Miller’s house. It’s a tune my dad came up with 10 or 15 years ago, but he hasn’t written any lyrics yet. I liked the melancholy tone of it, suitable for a guy sitting alone late at night in a big house.

Steve’s Song
Steve’s Song

Thanks again to my dad for contributing some authentic mid-sixties music to Chapter 1 of TMG!

Super Nervous

A few weeks ago I had an audition for Mutineer’s next production, Ditch written by the talented Ms. Taylor Coffman. I had not had an audition in quite a long time, so you can imagine I was super nervous. Yes, I know it was an audition for the theater company that I am a member of, and the people who were auditioning me are my friends. Yes, it was the most comfortable environment an actor could hope for when auditioning, but I was still super nervous! There were other very talented women up for the same role, and I knew I had stiff competition. I had to bring my A game if I wanted this role. I was also nervous because the people who were auditioning me are people who are not only my friends, but talented artists–people who I respect and whose opinions I value. They would know right off the bat if I was
doing a horrible job.

Before the Audition

The day of the audition, I had a friend from work help me prepare. Bless her heart, Ileea (my coworker) doesn’t know that much about acting, but she was right there trying to give me pointers and help me with my lines. She helped me feel more confident in my talent. Feeling a little more prepared, I headed to the audition and sat in the little waiting room. Waiting to be called in for my turn, I was able to talk briefly with Kenneth Requa, and Luke Goldstein, both company members that were facing the stiff competition I was, but for the male roles. Both Kenneth and Luke reassured me that there should be no pressure and that I should just go in and have fun. Think of it as practice. Lord knows I could use the practice.

The Audition

It is my turn, and as I walked in, I was greeted with warm smiling faces. I was at ease from that moment on. It didn’t matter how well I did or didn’t do. I walked into that room and gave my best. I had fun, and that was the main thing. I felt like I did really good and I had a damn good shot of getting the role. I had to nix that thought right away, because I didn’t want to get my hopes up too high. I had to let
go of that audition, move on and leave the decision in the capable hands of the four talented people in that room. I proved to myself and hopefully to them that I could do this.

After the Audition

This, unfortunately, won’t be the role in which I will be making my debut. I did not get the part. I could have done the part and done it well, but the woman that they chose is PERFECT for the role. Ms Nina Millin, the woman who got the part, will knock it out of the park, I have no doubts. The show is going to be great because they picked the right people for each role. I will still be a part of the show as the Stage Manager and this time I’m in charge (no assistant stage managing for me). I am very excited about starting and can’t wait for you all to see this awesome play.

Stay Tuned

But no worries. To my friends and family who have promised to come down and see me when I am actually in one of the plays, stay tuned!!!
I am holding you all to that promise. I will be on the stage soon!

Right after my mom passed away I went to see a therapist for a while. She charged me way too much money, wanted me to get angry at my mom, and suggested I write a play to help deal with my feelings. I stopped going to see her.

Later, I realized she was right about one thing; I needed something to do, something to create, something to focus my energy into regarding my mom. And one day, while I was poking around on Facebook, I noticed that my friend was doing a 365-day photo series. Every day for one year he would take a picture of something and post it on his profile page. My first thought was, “Wow that’s cool!” which was closely followed by the thought, “I want to take a picture of something every day that reminds me of my mom.”

On May 22, 2009 I began my series by taking a photograph of my mom’s cat, Sophie who had recently moved in with me. Since then, “Mom-Minders” have come to me from all areas of my life. Sometimes
it’s an object my mom gave me, or a food that we both enjoyed. Sometimes it’s an important date or a song. Very often it’s about sports.

I never know where a Mom-Minder will come from and some days they are harder to find than others. My favorites are the ones that surprise me. I’ll wake up with a pretty good idea of what I want to photograph that day, and then BAM, almost out of nowhere, something else comes along and I find myself saying, “Wow, this iced tea is unsweetened and my mom always asked for unsweetened iced tea!”

And by sharing my remembrances, people who may have never even met my mom feel connected to her too. I’ve gotten many comments on the series from people who enjoy reading it and learning about our relationship. One person (who I hadn’t seen in years) even stopped me on the street to say she’d been following the series. Every time I receive a comment, I feel so touched and moved that people enjoy viewing my posts. I am delighted to share such a special person with them.

Doing my photo series helps me stay connected to my mom and allows me to channel my unpredictable feelings into something creative and positive. Sure, sometimes I feel incredibly sad when I post my daily picture, but more often than not I laugh at a happy memory. I’ve learned that we are never really without the people that we lose. Everyday, the world presents us with events and objects that remind us of them, and as long as we remain open to the memories these things evoke within us, we will always keep our loved ones close. Click here to view the Mom-Minder series.

The first installment of The Miller’s Ghost is just days away.  I’m grabbing every spare moment I can to assemble the hours of raw recordings I have into something that resembles the piece I’ve been hearing in my head.  It’s tough to find those moments, since during the week I’m only able to work while my baby is napping, and that is often just 45 or so minutes at a time.  Still, little by little, it’s coming together.

Editing the performances hasn’t been too hard.  During the recording phase, I used the technique that served me as a music producer.  I have a different colored pencil for each take (blue for Take 1, red for 2, green for 3, purple for 4.  Hopefully 4 takes is enough!).  I write the time each section begins into the margins of my master script, and circle it when I know I got what I wanted.  When I’m ready to edit, I can see at a glance which audio file to use, jump right to that spot, and select that portion of the audio.

I often have pieces of lengthy sections come from several different takes.  I skip back and forth between those audio files, naming the audio regions in sequence (i.e. Kristi 1a, Kristi 1b, Kristi 1c).  When I have all the pieces of that character’s performance, I lay them end to end, trim as necessary to get the pacing I want, smooth any awkward transitions, then save the edited performance as a new file.

The tedious part is selecting and placing sound effects.  For example, I recorded about 45 minutes each of different flavors of rain and wind.  I have countless bits of doors – opening and closing, creaky ones, quiet ones, knocking and pounding.  Which is the perfect one to use at a particular point in the script?  It takes a lot of listening, adjusting position and levels, making sure everything fits together.  But I’m getting through it, one effect at a time.  I have two of the five chapters in the can, ready for the premiere on Tuesday.

It’s about to start…

Early on in the pre-production process for Lie with Me, Keith (artistic director and playwright) decided to open up the auditions to the entire DC casting pool rather than rely solely on the wealth of talent in Charter’s company and artistic associates.  Prior to flying east for casting I contacted several trustworthy DC theatre colleagues to provide recommendations of actors that I should see for our production. Since I had been in LA for 5+ years I was out of touch with the current talent on the boards in Washington.  In addition to appropriateness for the role I was particularly interested in actors that had not yet been getting the opportunities they deserved and was on the prowl for thinking actors with the courage, talent, and confidence to work with new material in a process with the playwright in the room.

Lie with Me deals with sensitive subject matter:  a love affair between a father (Stan) and daughter (Carla), a jealous sister (Susan), a mother in complicated denial (Joanna), and Carla’s unknowing boyfriend (Ian).  And all of this is designed to comprise a dark comedy.  The MTC production script was made available to every auditioning actor prior to the auditions and we lost more than a handful of actors for reasons of not being comfortable with the material.  Despite the disappointment it was essential to make sure we had actors that would be willing to invest their time and energy into the world that Keith had constructed.

There was a refreshing influx of new and interesting talent for us to consider along with some familiar faces from years past.  We were extremely pleased with the turnout and talent of the actors throughout.  We even made developmental progress as many of the choices made by the actors during the auditions shed new light on certain characters and situations.

In the end we cast two actors that I had worked with before at Charter:  Jim Brady and Maura McGinn to play Stan and Joanna.  Another DC stage vet in the form of Rana Kay would leave New York for a few months to play Carla, fresh out of University of Maryland undergrad Liz Brown would tackle Susan, and MTC company member Ryan Mulkay would fly 3000 miles from Los Angeles to play Ian. 

With the cast in place, I was then able to turn my attention to the design process.

Logline: A youth experiences more hostility than hospitality while trying to make friends and impress a girl amidst the competitive Los Angeles surf culture.  http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1100594/

This movie has become infamous within the group, so the “Take That, Dude” Film Festival was created. The rules are simple: Make a movie (two minutes or less) that uses the line “Take that, dude.”

So, here is mine. Pardon that I ignored the 2-min. rule. I’m happier without it.

In December of 2007 I met up with friend and playwright Keith Bridges to catch up on all things life and theatre while visiting family in Washington, DC over the holidays.  Keith is the Artistic Director of Charter Theatre and was in the midst of rehearsals for the latest piece he penned called F.U. (Forgive Us…what’d you think we meant?) under the capable direction of Joe Banno, another creative colleague and friend of mine.  During a delightful breakfast in Georgetown he offered to do an original play commission for Mutineer as part of a collaborative development process that I was interested in exploring. 

Despite my enthusiasm Keith refused to let me accept until I had returned to Los Angeles and had sufficient time to think about it.  As soon as my plane touched down in LAX and the air crew permitted the use of electronic devices, I eagerly called Keith to formally accept the commission.

After ongoing conversations with Keith during the ensuing months and attaching Joe Banno to direct the project, we decided to have Keith come out to Los Angeles to pitch his play ideas in person.  So in March 2008 I assembled a group of individuals of varying creative backgrounds and disciplines to hear Keith’s ideas (a group that later became the founding members of Mutineer Theatre Company).  The discussion afterwards was fruitful and inspired and we all seemed to gravitate to the same idea…to the most challenging idea that Keith had shared and, in fact, the first idea that Keith and I had come up with four months prior.  We were to write a play about a man who falls in love with his own daughter.  Keith would compose the piece in collaboration with our company and it was our hope and intention that it would serve as Mutineer’s debut production.

One year later we were days away from this reality.

So in March 2009 while Keith Bridges was in town for the opening of Mutineer Theatre Company’s debut production of his world premiere play Lie with Me, he, director Joe Banno, dramaturge James Utt, and I grabbed a late-night bite at Fred 62 to reflect as we barreled towards our first audience.  During the conversation we asked Keith if he thought that Lie with Me would have a run at Charter Theatre in DC.  Keith speculated for a moment and ultimately expressed his doubts that a piece about a love affair between a father and daughter would attract much of an audience in the nation’s capital.  The conversation then devolved into the typical “constructive” chat that one would expect to hear from a playwright, director, and artistic director gathered together away from the theatre during tech week.

A few months later—after a successful run of Lie with Me and the introduction of Mutineer to the LA theatre scene—I received a call from Keith that Charter had gotten three choice sets of dates in their performance venue and that they were going to expand their 2009-2010 season from two productions to three.  I congratulated him on his good fortune and he then informed me that he had decided to mount Lie with Me afterall and was hoping to do it as a co-production with Mutineer.  I was thrilled for Mutineer to have a part in a second run of our inaugural production.  Mutineer’s production had been well received by press and audiences alike while still representing significant potential for continued development.

After the reality of Joe Banno’s booked directing schedule and the logistics of bringing the LA actors east proved problematic for the Charter production, Keith (as Artistic Director) embraced the concept of using a different director, cast, and production team—a concept that he, Joe, and myself had actually tossed around as a possibility before Mutineer ever signed on the dotted line to produce the first run of Lie with Me.  We became fond of the idea of rotating the production team in the spirit of ongoing collaboration and exploration with the intention of re-imagining the piece FOR the piece.  The reverence for the work has always been a mainstay of Mutineer’s process so it fit well within our co-production model.

When I asked Keith who he had in mind to direct he somewhat surprisingly invited me to do it and just as eagerly as I did from the tarmac of LAX, I was all too pleased to accept.

So is anyone else disturbed by all the Beatles stuff that is penetrating the media lately? I know that this isn’t the first band that all this madness has happened to, and I am sure that it will not be the last, by any means. I guess it is just a little unsettling seeing these iconic figures as a video game–a video game that we can play where we can be just like them.

What happened to actually picking up a guitar and playing it for real? What is happening to our imaginations, our creativity, our art? Like I am one to talk; I don’t know how to play any kind of instrument, but I would love to.

I know I have definitely become a victim of all the hype as well. I was flying home from Northern California last weekend and instead of buying an In Style or Newsweek, I bought the Rolling Stones “Why the Beatles Broke Up”. It is hard not to. As a culture I think it is inevitable that when we find a group we like, we want to know the “True Hollywood Story”. We want to know all the inner workings of what made their genius tick and why it all fell apart.

Along with The Beatles, I have a handful of  favorite bands, Eagles of Death Metal, Starsailor, and The Devil Makes Three, just to name a few. I could listen to every song in their catalogs. They aren’t very popular yet, I guess by that I mean they haven’t made heavy rotation on MTV (don’t get me started on that; that is a whole new blog post). These bands aren’t selling out the Hollywood Bowl, and in a way, I am glad. I like having them to myself, in the small venues, when I am just inches from the stage instead of miles away and watching the whole show on a huge TV screen. I might as well stay home and play Rock Band. I want all these bands to succeed but not so much that they SELL OUT! The Machine has, for years, always overtaken artists and made them into action figures, lunch boxes, or video games. I guess I am just getting old enough to see it. Oops, it’s my age showing again.

Friday night is the culmination of four weeks of recording for The Miller’s Ghost. Marketplace Productions, my employer back in the days before I became a stay-at-home dad, was kind enough to allow me to use the Frank Stanton Studios in downtown LA. I’ve been there for eight hours each of the past four Saturdays, bringing in just about every available member of MTC to give voice to the characters I created.

The four narrators are played by myself, Jon Cohn, Myron Davis and Amy Schloerb. We each had several pages of narration to get through, so I scheduled two to three hour solo sessions for each of us. For the dialogue scenes, involving various other actors, I made sure that the narrators changed their position (sitting vs. standing), used a different microphone, and/or changed the pattern on the microphone (easily accomplished with the AKG 414s that now fill the talk studios). Even without any colorations I might add during the mix, this should make our voices sound different between narration and dialogue, which should help the listener as we go back and forth in certain passages.

Because this is an audio play, I had to cast people for their voices, disregarding any physical attributes that may or may not work for them in ordinary casting situations. This was liberating in some respects – there’s nothing to keep me from casting actors of different races as siblings – but limiting in others. There were several actresses in the company who simply weren’t going to be suitable to portray the eighth grade girls because their voices just sounded too mature. Luckily, the actresses whose voices were appropriate gave wonderful performances.

The other thing that struck me about this process was how finicky one has to be in directing it. In a staged production, you can’t be sure that an actor will execute a scene or a line of dialogue exactly the way you imagined. But, through weeks of rehearsal, you hopefully arrive at a point where you can trust that the actor will deliver, especially when the energy of a live audience is added to the mix. With a recording, you have to get the performance you want right there, in that session. If you don’t, it’s never going to happen. That can lead to a lot of takes. It’s fun, though, because it forces me to figure out how to communicate what I want, to invent language that will help another artist hear what I’ve been hearing in my imagination.

I’m very pleased with what the members of MTC have contributed to this project so far. Now, with the script recorded, I can start to put the pieces together.

After my first shoot with Natalie Young, it didn’t seem to take long for the photos to make it out into the universe.  Select images have been published in a South African photography magazine called “Migrate”, and Natalie was also invited to exhibit a series of the images in China this winter at the Lishui International Photo Festival .

Despite my absolute adoration of Natalie and her work, the passion for our ongoing collaboration, and my intrinsic desire to be able to take some credit for the photography, I feel that I should recognize Natalie as the obvious creative eye behind this project (unless she insists on sharing credit with me).

Here is something that she crafted recently to describe what I hope to be merely the beginning of many projects together:

“My series, LONGING, is a visual exploration of this emotion that is an ever-present part of human nature.  Throughout literature we encounter the archetype of The Wanderer, who roams both the real world and his own psychological landscape, driven by a longing for something he can’t quite define.  I believe we can all relate to this … it’s that disquiet that haunts the very back of our minds … the longing for some intangible thing that is not quite clear to us but that pushes us forward to seek it anyway.  It’s as if we are bumping about in the dark, tripping over our own desires, while trying to give rational words for what we seek.  Perhaps this longing itself serves some essential emotional purpose in the human psyche, far more necessary to us than the actual attainment.  We very well might need a touch of madness in order to follow our muse into the unknown.”—Natalie Young

And I too, as a wanderer, longingly follow my muse into the unknown.

I first met photographer Natalie Young in 2004 while I was working as staff at The Groundlings and she was hired to take portraits of the Groundlings past and present for a then upcoming 30th Anniversary event.  We bonded in photo sessions with some of their best-known alumni, but it wasn’t until my going away party from the Groundlings in 2005 and after several bourbons that I took the opportunity to confide some of my theatrical aspirations with Natalie.  Among them was the interest in figuring out a way for us to collaborate on something beyond her taking my headshots.

Like so many other enticing liquor-laden discussions of future commiserations in this city, we parted ways that evening with little likelihood of actually following through on our grand devices.

But that just wouldn’t do.

So our conversation would continue over the next 4 years, and Nat and I would brainstorm about unique collaborative opportunities.  I met and instantly adored her husband Jared, a talented musician and performer, and we have all been incredibly supportive of one another by attending each other’s various staged readings, performances, gallery shows, gigs, fundraisers, concerts, etc.  It has been wonderful…but still Nat and I hadn’t quite cracked the case of how we could find some sort of fulfillment by working intensely and exclusively with one another.

Then, last fall, after a series of impeccable meals in some of southern California’s most delectable eateries, Nat and I came up with the idea of establishing a classic yet timeless character (the Wanderer) to be the subject of an exploration of the theme of “longing”.  The plan was to get together in the south bay and “play” in some outdoor locations.  I would assemble a suitable costume for the character and Nat would tune up her antique Rolleiflex film camera for the shoot—to further blur any obvious remnants of a contemporary aesthetic.

The shoot was oddly freeing.  Nat and I used it as an opportunity to figure out our creative dialogue while being mindful of the theme of the project.  I would find myself attempting to interact with gravel, tall grass, trees, cement walls, abandoned houses, and anything that we would come upon.  I aimed to embrace the idea that I was navigating an unknown and unfamiliar universe with a psychological and emotional openness.  It was through this rather unique acting exercise that I also began to apply emotional attributes to the inanimate objects in proximity to me and attempted to respond to them.  I tried to focus on a pure and non-judgemental reaction to what I perceived within my inanimate scene partners.  When I shared this approach with Nat we quickly arrived at the conclusion that this world…this universe we were creating…was an emotional and psychological landscape rather than a physical one.  Excited by this discovery, we wandered around and shot for hours in Hermosa Beach and the surrounding areas.  Without the luxury of a digital camera, neither of us would have any idea of what we had until Nat developed the film.

And so I waited…

…and waited…

…and waited still…

Until finally Nat called me to tell me that she had developed the film and had emailed me a handful of proofs.

The images above whet our respective creative appetites and a second shoot became inevitable…but this time we were pretty confident it would take less than 4 years to materialize.

Please indulge me by returning to this blog to experience the next installment.  I promise not to make you wait as long as I did.

Today I distributed the final draft of The Miller’s Ghost to the rest of MTC. Here’s how it came together:

While I wrote three songs during my vacation in Oregon, I didn’t so much as open the file for TMG. It was too difficult for me to alter my headspace between composing music and writing a scary story. But with a pod meeting scheduled for the Tuesday night after my return (about 48 hours later) I had to find my way into the right headspace in a hurry. As I recall, I wrote something like 17 pages in that time, completing the first two chapters: The House on the Hill (mainly exposition) and Karl’s Tale (the ghost’s origin).

The meeting was attended only by Jon and Jimmy, so we traded off reading through the several parts. In the discussion that followed, we determined that the exposition needed to proceed more rapidly, while also doing more to enhance the spooky mood. My original plan to release each of the five chapters to the public in separate podcasts would not be practical given the realities of the story – we need to get to the ghost in the first installment. So the initial release in October will include the first two chapters. All the more reason to keep them as short as possible.

About 48 hours after that meeting I embarked on another vacation, this one taking up most of 10 days. Again, I didn’t do a thing for the script while on the trip. I had a read-through scheduled for the following Monday night, leaving me a week to write the 5th chapter, the only totally original part of the story. Naturally, I didn’t get busy on it until Saturday. My procrastination was rewarded when a crucial element of the climax occurred to me on Friday night, and another really fun scene invented itself as I was writing on Saturday. By 5:00 that evening, I had completed the final segment, Kristi Falls Behind.

The next day I revised the previous four chapters, then headed to Kinko’s to print out six copies. The full read-through was marvelously well-attended, with eleven people in the room – so many that I couldn’t properly involve all of them. I used the meeting as an opportunity to get an early look at casting choices, as well as to hear how the thing played out loud. A lot of the piece is left out in a reading, because the sound elements I’ll be assembling are at times as important as the characters, and the pacing isn’t always right when actors are looking at a script for the first time. But some of the actors fit the parts I had assigned them perfectly, and everyone seemed to get it.

I was really encouraged by the response from the Company. Other than the Kristi segment dragging a bit (not surprising, since I hadn’t had a chance to edit it at that point), there didn’t seem to be any significant problems with the script. Kenneth, the one writing the script for the musical, declined to nitpick the draft I sent him, saying he’d “shoot” the script as is. I know he wouldn’t hold out on me (heaven knows I’ve given him plenty of notes on the musical), so that told me that the piece is pretty tight. And in the discussion following the reading, several company members shared their stories of being in frightening places and situations. Amber wanted someone to walk her to her car after the meeting. That tells me that the story is having its impact.

I’m not a writer, certainly not of dialogue, so I’m proud of what I was able to do with this adaptation. Now the real work begins: turning it into something you can play on your iPod.

Sunday night’s Ditch workshop was amazing. Thanks to all who lent a hand.

It all started as a cozy read-through in our apartment the week before. In just 3 rehearsals, Jon practically staged the entire piece. Sometimes in very close quarters… Nina, Todd, Amber, Peter and Ron were patient and amazing with the pages of edits I sent them each day. James was great about lending another ear and even more sound input as I rushed to edit between breaks at work and rehearsal. Ginger was a rock throughout, taking care of everything at rehearsals so the rest of us could create in such rushed circumstances… It was not an easy week, at least for me. It’s all a bit of a blur now…

We were visited and helped by others as well. Doug Johnson of KPCC helped create the sound cues. Company member Luke Goldstein, Chris Hall and Brian Watt came to rehearsals and gave me feedback.

By Friday we were putting the pieces together… and come Sunday night, I think we truly gave the audience a night to enjoy. They were a great audience and it was fascinating to hear their responses.

I have a solid game plan to take me to the next stage in creation. I wouldn’t have gotten here without each and every one of you involved. Such an encouraging, character building experience…

Onward go I.

muchas gracias,

T

MTC,

Thank you.
Thank you to all of us for being honest and passionate.
Thank you for being the place where we can not only speak our minds, but where we encourage and expect each other to speak from our hearts.
It’s why I became an actor, struggled to become an actor…in order to find that place from which to be honest and real.
Thank you for being the place where we can put all that into our work, unfettered by the noise and clutter of what’s expected ‘out there’.
And thank you, great coincidences of time and space, that allowed our paths to cross so that we can pursue this, our own little mutiny.
Ok, and now, unfettered…back to work!

For a recent table read of the Untitled Prom Musical, I asked those participating if any of them would be willing to bring their laptop and read from a digital copy of the script. The musical has 9 speaking parts, and the script is nearly 100 pages long, which is a lot of trees and toner to use on a very early draft that will be outdated as soon as it’s read. Many were able to oblige, and those who asked for paper copies didn’t do so because they’re in the deforestation business. There is a tangible difference between reading from (and certainly taking notes on) a digital copy versus good old-fashioned laser-jet and paper. This is a creative process, and the tools we use can have an effect on our perceptions of the work.

This is something we have to confront in the writing process as well. Screenplays and stage plays have certain format requirements, and so, of course, there’s software designed specifically for writing in those formats. Personally I’ve taken to using the open source program Celtx over the more popular (and expensive) Final Draft. But there are certainly times when trying to get ideas to materialize into early drafts when using these kinds of programs feels limiting, or in some way intimidating. So I’ll often, especially for lyric writing, switch over to trusty MS Word, tossing format to the wind and just trying to make…myself…keep…typing.

When it comes to just trying to get down a few thoughts, maybe a rough outline or just some key questions/ideas/concepts, even MS Word feels too formal, or too binary. That’s when it’s time to break out a notebook and a pen, as they did in ancient times.

Process is important. Medium affects the message. But how do you begin to choose how to begin writing? It’s something I find myself confronting not just at the start of each project, but almost every time I sit down to write. It’s about finding what least inhibits the ideas at that moment.

So what greases your creative wheels best? If you have an idea while you’re out at a bar, do you reach for a napkin or the notes app on your iPhone? Maybe you send yourself a text or leave a message on your own answering machine? Do you still worship at the altar of the Underwood in your bay window, or cling to your ragged moleskine? Are you a fountain pen snob or a Final Draft addict?

For the record, I wrote this in TextEdit. Just to mix it up.

Boys wrestling

My brother inspires me, all the hard work and dedication he puts into a traditional family sport (Swiss Wrestling), that he loves. Despite the toll it is taking on his body. (He is the one about to get tossed)

Group of people

My Whole family, and this is just my mom’s side. ( Where’s Ginger??? Hint… I am on the very very right side… I have my Big LA sunglasses on… Give up??? I am standing below the girl (who is standing on a bench) in the pink. See me now!!

Recently my family and I went to Portland, OR on vacation–one, to visit some good friends and two, because we love hanging out there.  We stayed in Hawthorne, in the southeast section of the city, east of the river.  In some ways, Portland is the opposite of LA…everyone in Hawthorne has a vegetable garden, everyone rides their bikes everywhere and it feels green, green, green, and shady.

On our first evening walk (and we walked everywhere) we stopped for some tacos, and watched as about 25 nude bike riders whizzed by.  Welcome to Portland!  The next day a passing biker cheerfully recited some poetry at me–by the sound of it, made up on the spot.  Cooky things like that.  As for the vegetables everywhere, I was impressed.  Sometimes it’s hard enough keeping up with our local farmers’ markets, let alone growing our own vegetables.

But next year, yes, next year I will start with some squash.  I know those are easy, I think even I should be able to keep them alive long enough to bear fruit.  Would someone please make sure I stick with this?  Like, in time for me to plant them?  Because otherwise, another year will go by where I thought I would raise some of our own food and I will start to believe that I just can’t do it, and that would be a shame.  Maybe by writing this it will happen, because I will remember having written this.  Or better, maybe I will enter it in my calendar for next spring:  “Plant squash after MTC production closes”.

Whichever way, 2010 will bear squash.

Why get involved with a theater company like Mutineer? There is a finite amount of time in a week, so why commit an indefinite amount of time and energy to THIS group? That is time and energy that won’t be spent at the gym or at the piano. It’s a commitment that will, inevitably, prevent me from doing something ELSE that I’d like to do.  In a world where technology allows us to parcel out our time and energy in smaller and smaller packets, why fragment it further?

The answer came quickly, and it is the same thing that has compelled me to participate in almost every enjoyable endeavor I’ve been a part of: because of the people.

The Mutineers with whom I’ve had the pleasure to interact at Stab Labs over the last several months while developing the musical are really a fun bunch to be around. They’ve created an atmosphere conducive not just to the development of specific original works, but to the growth and strengthening of creative energies. There are myriad perspectives and backgrounds brought to the table, all linked by a common enthusiasm for watching new stories unfold.

The work is what brings us together, and any theater company can take pride in the wake of a successful production. But what really makes Mutineer tick is the people who come together willing to give of their own talents, learn from those around them, and create a positive space from whence good storytelling will come.

And that’s why I’m thrilled to be embarking with the company.

I have unashamedly been listening to Michael Jackson’s 2001 Number 1 hit “You Rock My World” on repeat in my car. I’ve watched the full-length short film and various other music video-length versions of the same. As I watch the video two thoughts go through my mind: 1) Calling him talented would almost be an understatement. 2) What a waste that he’s dead.

My writing/producing partner, with whom I’m working on a web series, attended the funeral service at the Staples Center with his wife. While visiting them a few days after the service, his wife handed me the funeral booklet with personal messages from family and friends along with photos of MJ. One message struck me; it was from his sister LaToya. She said that while watching the 1980 Grammys, he began crying because he had only won one Grammy. He promised her he would win more Grammys and sell more records than anyone on his next album.

She went on to say…

You began to write that dream all throughout your bedroom, on the walls, on the mirrors, in your books and anywhere else you could find space. You started working much harder, creating sounds in songs that the world had never heard before, you started dancing until you would literally collapse. When most artists were trying to learn how to sing and do a two-step, you were singing and moonwalking. You took your dream to a much higher level and turned it into a reality, a reality of over 100 million records sold on that next album, “Thriller”.

I was touching base with a young woman, who I’d known years ago. I am a friend of the family and look at her as a little sister. She is a 22-year old dancer who is finishing up her Bachelors in Theater Arts with a Dance concentration. It seems fitting as I write this that she is not much older than MJ was during that Grammy show. She was telling me she hadn’t booked a job in two years and seemed to have a lot of time on her hands now that she wasn’t in school. She expressed a confusion about the direction to take in her life and had questions: Now that she was getting older by dance standards, should she turn to choreography? Should she focus on finding a relationship and dating?

My response was simple:

“If someone asked you if you were a good modern dancer, you’d say yes. If someone asked you if you were a great modern dancer, you might also say yes. But, if someone asked you if you are a world-class modern dancer, what would your response be? You have nothing right now, while you’re waiting to book a job, but time and opportunity. Be able to answer yes to that question (if it’s what you want). Then, do the work that will make that a reality.

As I counseled her I was really speaking to myself. It’s so easy to get caught up in things we can’t control. But, getting better at our craft and working hard are things we can control. Bottom line for me is that hard work is the fastest short-cut I know to turning a dream into a reality.

When I first arrived here, a local friend told me the L.A. rule regarding left turns:  “After the green light changes back to red, two cars are allowed to turn left. If a third car tries, it will be honked at or cut off.”

Seeing my skepticism, my buddy offered to test the theory at every intersection for the next half hour.  Sure enough: Two cars, no problem; Third car, derisive honking.  It took me a while to acclimate, but I could see the reasoning.  After all, without that protected left arrow, sometimes the only cars able to get through the intersection were the two turning after the red light.

There’s no mention of it in the Driver’s Handbook and yet the two-car rule somehow became an accepted practice for millions of SoCal drivers.  Even with new protected left turns installed along that same stretch of road I routinely see two cars being allowed to cheat the red light.

Observing this reminded me of my own habits.  I’ve been approaching new situations with the same old actions, too.  Waiting for the green arrow, I thought about behaviors that might be rooted in out-dated or false perceptions.  I am challenging myself to react less defensively and to see things more accurately.
If a light can change, so can I.

photo by steev-o

From a young age, I’ve just been one of those people who aims to please… probably not the healthiest thing… probably still isn’t. When I think of myself as a performer, it’s pretty clear how this need manifests–the joy I get from making people laugh… making people think… inspiring people… There is a distinct connection between myself and this hope to connect to others–for them to “like” me.

But, I often wonder: When does this “need to please” become destructive in art?

As I write, I often get feedback. Much I actually take; some I try to apply, but it doesn’t quite fit. And, I have to ask myself: Who does this play belong to? Me? Or them? Or everyone?

Gosh, that’s an ocean–who does art belong to? Right now I think this play is still mine. At least I am trying to claim it. As the artist molding it, it’s still my story to tell. Because, when I find myself trying to apply everyone’s notes, the result is often a mess. It gets away from me, and I realize I can’t please everyone for the piece to be truly cohesive.

I think about Hollywood, the Industry. It’s ALL about pleasing… the audience, the producers… always trying to get someone to like us. Every TV show is put through network testing–who is liked/who scores low? A lot of blockbusters are derivative of old films or inspired by something nostalgic (e.g. Transformers, Indiana Jones, etc.) so that there is already a built-in audience who ALREADY like it before it’s made.

The Business of Entertainment: It’s about an audience LIKING it. Right?? So where does the line between art and entertainment truly lie??? Am I an Artist? Am I an Entertainer? Am I an entertaining artist??

But, then it’s another whole can of worms–what is art? I sat through hours in Aesthetics class in college trying figure that out.

Clearly, I’m good at asking questions. I am not so good with answers. But I DO know in life, if you’re always trying to please others, you rarely have a moment to please yourself. As a playwright, if I don’t like my own play, what’s the point?? It’s a piece of my soul. It’s a piece of my story. It’s a world from my imagination moving from the ether to the letters on the page, to the heart of an actor, to the steps upon a stage, to the eyes of the audience.

Jon has a shirt that says “The Audience is King” which is probably true, since there is a lot of power in having the last word.  But, that’s a lot of pressure, and pressure sometimes makes creativity die–like that study with the little kids. One group was simply told to draw, while another group was told to draw with the winner getting a prize.  The group without pressure created, in general, far superior work than the ones under pressure.

In a world that is rather cruel to artistic types, pleasing yourself seems vital. I hope to create art the first and foremost brings me joy…

I hope you like it too.

MTC will soon decide upon its next production.  In addition to budget, cast size, set design and other considerations, there is the eternal debate:  Comedy or Drama?

It’s doubtful that any theatergoer seeks out one format exclusively.  I know I don’t. For example, in the span of a week, I saw Oleanna at the Mark Taper, Dame Edna at Ahmanson, and The Elephant Man at Andak Stage Company.

I recently saw shows that blended elements of both. The barbed political wit of The Geffen’s Farragut North and the dating ridiculousness of Macha Theatre’s He Asked for It lightened their darker subject matter.

MTC is a diverse group interested in the whole range of theatre. Thoughtful comedies, humorous dramas, tragedy, satire, avant-garde and farce all have champions within the company.  I think the same is true for our audience.

So the choice before us isn’t really about comedy versus drama. It’s about which production (regardless of tone) will offer the best audience experience and strengthen the Mutineer name.

It’s a tough decision but we’ll have an answer soon.

Check out this video. A group of artists collaborating to make this in a week of time. Watching this kinda thing will surely lower your blood pressure.

I enjoyed Hamlet 2 the other night.  Even though it’s a comedy about the self-absorption and insecurity of actors — embodied almost too well by Steve Coogan — the movie illustrates some useful principles:

•         Personal stories — like the fight for a father’s approval — are universal stories.
•         Take the risk; don’t let fear hold you back.
•         Creation is more productive and fulfilling than whining.

In the film, Dana Marschz, an actor whose biggest claim to fame is an infomercial for the Jack LaLanne Juicer, has been relegated to teaching drama in an Arizona high school.   After being notified that the principal is killing the arts program, Dana is inspired to save his classes (or go out with a bang) by writing a sequel to Hamlet.

Why Hamlet?  Because just like the bodies at the end of Shakespeare’s tragedy, the dead ends in Dana’s life have been piling up.  In a hopeful piece of wish fulfillment, the defeated teacher imagines a time machine that allows him, Hamlet and Jesus to embark upon a musical fantasy of paternal reconciliation and filial redemption.

Don’t get me wrong, this movie isn’t above hitting someone in the head with a trashcan for a laugh and its R rating keeps it far from afterschool special sentimentality.  But in addition to the comedy there is a loving, relatable look at the pretension, the trials, and the benefits of theatre.

I’m in Sunriver, OR this week visiting my wife’s family. It’s a gorgeous setting amidst the pines and meadows of the high desert, and I’m surrounded with good company and good food. Yet I’m making an effort to tear myself away from all that for at least two hours every day in order to work on the musical and the audio play. With so many friendly hands to help out with my baby, this is the best chance I’ve had to bear down and work in many weeks.

Coming into this week, I’ve written a little more than 40% of the ghost story and three songs for the musical. By the time I head back to Pasadena on the 19th, I hope to have at least completed Act One of the musical (four more songs) and finished a complete first draft of The Miller’s Ghost. It’s an ambitious workload, but I’ve got large amounts of the work pre-composed in my head, and I always work best when I’ve got a deadline staring me in the face.

I’m off to a pretty good start. This afternoon I sequestered myself for a couple hours in a bedroom and wrote the first half of the Act One finale, a song called “Our Little Secret.” The second half is mostly a repeat of the first, so it shouldn’t take very long to polish it off tomorrow. I was working with my guitar today; my wife’s uncle is bringing a keyboard in a couple of days, which I’ll be able to use for some more intricate songs later in the week. It’s funny to have to look forward to a vacation as the best opportunity to work!

We had a stab lab today (see Taylor’s blog post, What is this thing called STAB LAB???). We worked on Taylor’s play “Ditch”, a piece that is about a relationship between a man and a woman and their inner struggles to deal with that relationship. I got to read the part of Elizabeth and I got to say a line that really hit home for me: “When does my life actually actually start?”

My birthday is coming up in a few days, so it has got me thinking. A year older, another year wiser, but am I where I thought I would be when I’m thirty…ISH? No! I had so many dreams of what life would be like. A loving marriage to a man who adores me. Shuffling the kids off to baseball practice. A house with a big back yard and maybe a pool, and finally, the family dog that would go on every family trip with us. The whole nine yards. At least that is the path that everyone in my family has seemed to have taken. The generic “Leave it to Beaver” dream. Really looking back, was that my dream or was it just expected that I would have those things since that is what my parents did? What their parents did…and so on?

Why is it that I thought my life would start once I was married, once I found that prince charming? Oh! Because that is the idea that every romantic comedy shoves down young girls’ throats. The girl always gets the guy, they live happily ever after….blah, blah, blah. Damn, I am starting to sound very bitter….I am not! I swear!  If it happens, it happens, awesome, but I am tired of waiting. I’m more interested in taking care of me and the artist in me that I have ignored for way to long. The artist that I have been afraid to show.

Why am I so afraid of taking those piano lessons, or taking a painting class, or even getting back into an acting class? Oh, yeah! That fear of failure, rejection and the worst of all, fear of the work and commitment. Well I still need to work on getting over all of that fear; that will be a gradual process. I have never been the “just dive in” type. I go in one toe at a time to test the water. Although, as I am getting older, I am getting to know myself better….not the person I think people want to see but the person I WANT TO BE! Ahh, and my Mutineer family has inspired me to find my inner artist. There are so many talented, brilliant, creative people in this company. They have helped me realize that my artist life has begun and I am missing it waiting for that guy. What was his name again? Oh, yeah. Mr. Charming.

It’s sometimes the hardest thing to do. Recently I embraced the idea that I was coming up on my one year anniversary of residency in Los Angeles. So far I can say that this town has been good to me—even in the harsh times it is going through. But, I had a thought. In the apartment complex in which I live my roommates and neighbors (6 young men in total) all moved here with a common goal. In one sense or another we moved here to work or perform in the entertainment industry. Though we spend plenty of time together as friends, we had yet to put a project or creative venture into motion. It would only make sense, right? We had all the means and know-how but had not yet put one in motion…

So, long story short I proposed that we set aside one evening to shoot a 3-minute movie. This idea sparked a lengthy discussion of many possible ideas on how to go about this. In the end we all decided to the following: giving ourselves a starting time to pick a genre out of a hat, 30 min. to brainstorm ideas, 30 min. to write a script and 5 hours of rehearsal, set-up, shooting, music (originally composed) and editing. In total we allowed ourselves 6 hours and 11 minutes (being that our address is 611) to complete the task.

It should be stated that this was done with the sole purpose of getting creative juices flowing and executing an idea. It was the first of hopefully many attempts, but in the end the feeling was that it was definitely worth it. Getting it started took too long, but I believe the lesson was learned to just do…something, anything…just do.

Enjoy.

Anne Lamott (Photo by mdesive)

So I’ve decided to re-read Anne Lamott’s Bird By Bird. I read it in college a couple moons ago, and now seemed a good time to read it again. The first page struck me as she says simply:

“The first thing I tell my new students on the first day of a workshop is that good writing is about telling the truth. We are a species that needs and wants to understand who we are. Sheep lice do not seem to share this longing, which is one reason they write so very little.”

First of all… she rocks. Second, I couldn’t agree more. But for me it goes beyond writing to art. I want to see truth in art. Honesty. Honesty and truth about who we are. I think that is one thing that drew me toward writing Ditch – my need to want honest and truthful discussion about self and love.

I look forward to re-reading this book as I write. But it also translates toward being an actor. A good actor, I believe, lives in the truth of the story they are telling, the truth in their experience…

Sheep lice are gross by the way.

Women: While growing up in the black church and within a black family, respect was something that was drilled into me. I was surrounded by strong, assertive women who spoke their minds; the men were no slouches either.

Now as a man, I have some amazing female friends. My life would be so different without their love, support, protection and insight. As an artist and observer of the human condition, I have learned so much from them. I’ve learned as they’ve shared their guy problems with me how much of themselves they hide and how often they’ve sought self-worth as women through different relationships, education and careers.

Men: I have been attending a class for men at my church, Oasis, called Wild at Heart that examines manhood from an unusually sensitive place. I’d like to share two questions that have come up in the class: 1) When you feel most naked like the biblical Adam, what fig leaf do you hide behind? 2) As you boys we often ask ourselves (and our dads) THE question which is “Am I enough?”.

Human beings: Some men may be from Mars, and some women from Venus, but in the end we have the commonality of all being aliens. We don’t always speak the same language, but we feel the same things. Two of those things are to love and respect ourselves and to have others love and respect us.

Artists: Ask most guys who picked up a guitar at 16, and they’ll tell you they started playing to be popular with girls. For a performer, you hit that stage and if you’re even remotely good with the right audience, Boom! Instant “love.” No. it’s not really love, but sometimes the counterfeits of praise, adulation, awe, lust and jealousy (usually coming from other guys who have no musical ability) seem to be worthy substitutes while the high lasts.

Titan Arum

I went to the Huntington Library and Botanical Gardens last month to see the Titan Arum or “Corpse Flower.”  With a bloom reaching six feet in height, this native to Sumatra is considered the world’s largest flower, but it is just as famous for the odor of rotting meat it gives off to attract insects.   Titan Arums can go many years between blossoms so when I found out that one was right here in our own backyard, I hurried to Pasadena to see it.

After a few minutes in a line filled with curious adults and kids, I got to see Titan Arum for myself. It’s about the size of  Audrey II from Little Shop of Horrors.   It was reaching the end of its short bloom cycle, so instead of decaying flesh, the Titan Arum smelled more like cabbage.  Even without the corpse odor it was still worth it to see something firsthand that I only read about.

To me, the Titan Arum event was like the best theatrical productions.  It ran for a limited time, was best experienced in person, and created a memory that will last a lifetime.

Crack Dip

So, I got a lot of great comments on my last blog “LA living!” and one major question. “What exactly is Crack dip?”. It is a delightful highly addictive sausage dip that I try to bring to every Mutineer company meeting. I introduced it to the Mutineer family one late night rehearsal for “Lie With Me”. I was just trying to be a good stage manager, making sure my people where fed. So, I brought my crack dip and my chips with a hint of lime and served it to my hungry crew. And, that was it; they were hooked. One bite and they were crack dip junkies.

I would give out the recipe, but it is a family secret that has been passed down from generation to generation. My grandmother gave it to my mother. My mother passed it to me, and I must pass it along to my first born daughter…..No, not really. My friend Pamela gave me the recipe. (The first part sounds more interesting though, doesn’t it?) I think Pam’s brother named it and maybe even invented it–not sure of the complete history, but it got its name because it is so addicting. One bite and I dare you to stop!

You might be wondering… as am I… what’s next for MTC??? Well in my personal opinion, it could be one of the amazing things percolating in what we MTCer’s call STAB LAB. What started as a workshop for scenes and audition sides has truly evolved into where the magic is happening! (although scenes and audition sides are still more than welcome). Its name came from an email exchange between Jon and me–and, well, my suggestion for calling it STAB LAB was actually half a joke–but it stuck and now there’s no going back. I do admit though it’s a perfect title. Mutineers probably stabbed each other a bunch. And it’s our way of “taking a stab” at new material…

The work in the last few STAB LABs has been truly inspired. It’s where the heart and soul of our mission is truly manifesting itself. While people are working in pods and on their own, STAB LAB is where all the collaboration truly comes together. I would ALMOST venture to say, coming to STAB LAB as a company member right now is just as valuable as coming to company meetings.

Our session this morning included a scene for James’ radio play plus James & Kenneth’s new musical, a couple Ditch scenes, a couple of scenes from Todd’s play, plus a scene from a guest Ekene, characters by Nina, and a truly honest and thoughtful monologue by Ginger. I am not ashamed to say the pieces were diverse, fun, thought provoking and simply inspiring! I truly hope everyone continues to bring such awesome stuff, because I leave feeling so jazzed about WHAT COULD BE for us.

So what’s next for MTC? No one is EXACTLY sure, but what’s happening RIGHT NOW is STAB LAB, and it’s a F$%king blast. I’m gonna go dry my hair now.

I was walking down the street in my neighborhood and thinking about what I need to be doing to kick my career to the next level as a director-writer-actor. The main answer that came to me was to “be prolific.” What prolific meant to me as I walked was to focus on quantity, not to the exclusion of but with preference over quality. I needed to get my momentum going by just making more mistakes i.e. learning by doing.

When I was living in Queens, NY, I finally made the decision to get comfortable on the guitar. I committed to practicing four hours a night after I got home from work. I remember one night getting home around 1 A.M. from seeing a buddy perform and picking my guitar up to start my 4-hour session. I made some horrible sounds with that guitar, but after a while I started to make “something approaching music.”

Fast forward to now and I am writing more and more, not as consistently as I practiced guitar, but I’m building momentum.

Mutineer Theatre Company hosts Stab Lab every few weeks for writers and actors to take a “stab” at sharing things they are working on. There is no requirement that you bring a piece, but there is the opportunity if you are so inclined. For the sake of full disclosure, I have to admit I’ve never attended a stab lab. Now I can also admit that part of the reason I have never attended one of the stab labs may be the unspoken guilt I feel of not having anything written to show.

The good thing is that now I know the answer to my “problem” is simple. Just be prolific.

I have long believed that theatre artists were far more successful at their craft when they had the opportunity to experience the world that they live in rather than submerge themselves in rather extensive programs to learn about it.  That’s not to say that training is irrelevant or unimportant–just a feeling that an equal measure of life is a vital supplement to more effectively and accurately observe, reflect, and comment upon the human condition.

Mutineer Theatre Company recently passed its one-year mark.  We are a brand-new non-profit theatre company in the worst economic recession since the Great Depression.  We are actively developing multiple original projects that all have the potential to be produced on our stage and at the same time we are strategizing our financial development efforts so that these endeavors can be actualized.  I find that I am tempted by the thought of submerging myself in all of the work that must be done for Mutineer and allow for no other outside activities or distractions.  But then it occurs to me that this would not only be a disservice to our company and to myself as an artist but also to the theatre community at large if I didn’t get out there to see what shows were running.  

Shows like MERCURY FUR at needtheater, THE UNSEEN at the Road Theatre Company, Wooster Group’s LA DIDIONE at Redcat, and LUMINOUS BIRCH at Greenway (to name a few) have done their part to remind me of the importance of supporting the work of other L.A. theatres.  I have been rewarded with engaging and inspiring theatrical experiences.

In a sense–perhaps supporting other theatres is the equivalent of Mutineer “paying the rent” and helping to “keep the lights on.”  It’s an obligation and investment that yields us our home:  a place where informed and creative endeavors can be centered.  We embrace a sense of community as we work in similar and dissimilar ways, on differing and like projects, for individual and collective reasons, and with varying degrees of success.  But by being constant in our provision of an audience “on the first of the month”, we take considerable steps forward to secure the next, to enrich the future, and to make ourselves a home.

Upon my suggestion, three of us Mutineers went to see La Didone at the Red Cat last week.  My husband and I had seen Wooster Group’s ‘Hamlet’ there last year, and loved it.  That production had simply employed a fast-forwarded Richard Burton film recording of Hamlet from 1964 as a sort of choreographic skeleton upon which to hang this full length production of the play.  The result was a surprisingly brisk, expressive and witty work.  I came away thinking, ‘Well, of course, how else to do Hamlet’, the idea and its execution were so elegant, simple and somehow complete.

La Didone employed a similar device among other ingredients in a sort of interwoven matrix, including a sixteenth century Italian opera of that name.  This time the actors were mimicking an old Italian sci-fi film with somewhat similar themes as the opera, if you think around a few corners.  There was an emphasis on screens and the perception of images on them vs. the real bodies on stage.  There was the juxtaposition of old and new, through the inclusion of what seemed like a baroque 12 string lute, the original score and a host of high tech video equipment streaming live feeds of the actors on stage.  The work was beautifully sung and the scenarios were at times wonderfully witty, but all together it felt like a spectacle of disparate parts, as maybe it was intended to.  However, the satisfaction was missing, as in ‘Hamlet’, of experiencing a brilliant device translating a known work in a way that felt integral from beginning to end.  Having seen Hamlet, it felt repetitive to watch the actors in La Didone constantly referencing video screens to keep time with the movie.

About half of the company gathered at my house last weekend for a table read of Act One of “Prom Night!” It wasn’t going to be practical to present any music in this format, since the folks reading the various characters weren’t necessarily singers, and I hadn’t necessarily written most of the songs. I volunteered to read the part of Nathan, whose big solo I had already composed, so that I could at least sing the few things I had somewhat determined musically up to that point. Mainly, people just recited the song lyrics.

But the real purpose of the afternoon was to help Kenneth find out what was working and what still needed to be tweaked. The read-through took about 55 minutes, so we figure that when all of the music is added Act One will run a little over an hour – basically, an ideal length. Those who were new to the material generally laughed in the right places, and at the end most were excited to find out what happens next. In that respect, the draft was in good shape.

In the hour or so of discussion which followed, the Company members pointed out that there wasn’t enough definition of the two main female characters. Kenneth had noticed this in one of the earlier drafts and was already trying to shape their personalities and revise other scenes he had written a while ago to be consistent with the changes. The other major complaint was that Scott, a very prominent character, didn’t really show up for the final third of the act, and wasn’t making enough of an impression to establish his relationship with the girls.

Kenneth had addressed all of these issues in a new draft within 48 hours. By mid-week, he had written about half of Act Two. I had expected this project to take all year, but it suddenly looks likely that Kenneth will be finished with his part by the end of the summer. I’ll never keep up with that pace. I’m just hoping to be able to present a new song every two weeks. That should still get it done by late fall. We’re both going about our business with a sense of giddy wonder. We’d imagined ourselves writing this piece for a long time, but now we’re actually doing it!

Where the Hell is Matt? (2008) from Matthew Harding on Vimeo.  (Find out more about Matt)

I really just want to see the world.  I love this video because it shows so many amazing and beautiful places I can travel to some day!